Bring Your Kùmò, Bring Your Póńpó! by Odolaye Aremu

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[Analyses]–…a lot of jingoism about the Ààre Ònà Kakanfo title! And from where I am standing, I firmly believe the matter is decided anyway between the dirty, brown envelopes; the ‘over-turalized’ King constantly struggling to keep up the already dead hype; and the old, hideous carpenter who struck gold trying to step over the infamous MC Oluomo to regional prominence. We remember how well and how much he loves us all in Yorubaland!

That love was so strong, he practically held the State Of Aquatic Splendor hostage a little over two years ago with his dreaded thugs- in the desperate attempt to stop his pot of soup from being upended, literally by the then popular Sai Baba!

I thought life was pretty much like some sports, where individual jerseys and numbers are liable to retirement as meritoriously as the men and women who wore them better than others! And with the routine, individual tragedies historically linked to that title, I feel the next best thing to do is to pull it up the rafters, keep it there and let it stay there forever, so we can savor the stories of the past holders like the diligent lovers of thriller and horror flicks that we are! But I somehow suspected something was up when the ambitious old Carpenter was running back and forth to the dingy palace, and as he ran abroad too to acclaim himself and when I started seeing familiar faces running aggrandizing tales around him, apparently to sweeten the sourpuss and to butter up his flat bread! For better, or for worse I noticed they kept his name fervently in the news!

To put things in proper perspective: If Akintola had it once, then many years later Abiola had it too, it is quite instructive that the standard to stand in that same pit those legends once stood in ought to be so high, even Tinubu ought to take a prolonged leak, swallow hard and possibly break some loud, melodious wind to really be considered for it! But it is a shame it is all about money! It is all about blind greed! And it is all about no shame! May Edumare continue to give the likes of Akanbi, the petulant King the grace to continue to shame this proud race more and more!

Edumare you are praised! It is only a romanticized, worthless title afterall! The likelihood of its impetus over me is significantly farfetched!

Now bring your Kùmò, bring your Póńpó, come and beat me to your hearts fill!

Odolaye Saburi Aremu is a social observer, commentator and an oddball with a usually, unusually perspective on social issues. He’s a retired baby boomer, presently residing at Fiditi, Afijio LGA Oyo State.




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